Brunch at Glover Park’s gluttonous southern restaurant Kitchen may just save your life. Or at least your Sunday.

The following advice is highly scientific.

Step 1:  Spicy bloody mary

Though it may pain you to even fathom the idea, the potent combo of salty tomato juice, spice, and just the right amount of vodka will ease you back into your former self. Kitchen’s version arrives in a mason jar, which just serves to remind you that you are in the trenches and making yourself feel better is your job.

Steps 2 and 3 after the jump.

Step 2: Cheesy grits

Lord have mercy on these cheddar cheese grits. They are so rich. And creamy. And cheesy. We ordered the side of grits as an afterthought. I thought I’d have just a spoonful or two. I was wrong. This dish is a diet killer like no other. The photo does it no justice. Of course, pretty grits are about as useful as a carpenter with soft hands.

Step 3: Appropriately greasy entree

The brunch menu offers plenty a tempting dish. I’ve never met a chocolate-hazelnut breakfast I didn’t like. The choice of three mini-sliders (hamburger, crab cake, chicken sandwich) may be just the trick with the indecisive diners. But two called our names louder than any others: eggs creole and croque madame. The eggs creole, shrimp in smoked tomato ragout with two poached eggs and a side of homefried potatoes, were a note-perfect Sunday morning coming down dish. The tomato ragout hit the high notes with its combination of sweet and smoky doing a two-step alongside the unctuous golden egg yolks. The shrimp were charred just-so and delivered the perfect crunch. The croque madame delivered on the southern style by arriving with andouille sausage with the requisite fried egg. A slightly stingy application of sauce (in this case gouda and herb mayo) kept the sandwich from greatness.

Steps are complete. Go forth and conquer your couch.

Kitchen 2404 on Urbanspoon